The Memorial at the hospital was a really lovely service. Very emotional, but lovely. The turnout wasn't great. It was the first year for such a Memorial so we hope that in time the word will get out and that more people will feel comfortable coming. It's such a slippery slope. Once you get yourself there you can feel the love, the comfort, the compassion and understanding resonating from others who feel your pain... it's just getting the courage to walk through those doors. I will be putting my "thinking cap" on to come up with ways to reach out and encourage these parents to join us next year. I truly think that it's such an important way to honour our babies, to honour ourselves as their parents.
I stayed and personalized a few wings. Heard stories of loss, of course, but also stories of hope and of peace. I was very grateful to be there, to offer Nicholas' wings, to share his legacy, to express my love for him. The hospital kept the rest of the wings to include in care packages, as tokens of comfort, and maybe some for next year's service.
A beautiful mother (who is also a beautiful friend and fabulous nurse) bravely stood in front of the gathering and talked about her son. She spoke of her love for him. She spoke of the intensity of losing him much too soon. She spoke of her understanding of the immense grief that each of us suffer with on a daily basis. She also read the following poem. And she did this with the dignity and grace I knew she would.
My Little One, My Dear One, My LoveMy little, one, my dear one, my love,
you will be with me forever:
in the thin sunlight and long shadows
of a clear winter's day;
in the dawn excitement of birds
sounding in early spring;
in the rustle of heavy-leafed trees
in a mind-summer's night;
in the rich aromas and bright colours
of a warm autumn day.
All that is excellent,
brushed by Life's
brightness and shadow,
will remind me of you,
My little one, my dear one, my love.
You will beat with my heart,
see through my eyes,
hear with my ears,
feel on my skin.
Because your soul is mingled with my soul, forever,
My little one, my dear one, my love.
~Edward Searl
